As Jesus was speaking to the crowd, his mother and brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him. Someone told Jesus, “Your mother and your brothers are standing outside, and they want to speak to you.”
Jesus asked, “Who is my mother? Who are my brothers?” Then he pointed to his disciples and said, “Look, these are my mother and brothers.” —Matthew 12:46–48
I love family. Family is family. Someone has joked that you can choose your friends, but you’re stuck with your family! It’s true!
Families are a gift. But, in those closest relationships there can be friction.
And here is one example of the crazy dynamics of family: often family members will take the advice of others before they take yours. What is that?
Sometimes family members are the hardest get through to, even as an adult. It is often difficult to gain credibility with your parents—whether you’re trying to explain a new paradigm, or even sharing a new direction that you’re going in life. Because, in their mind (as they listen to you skeptically), they may be thinking “Whatever. I changed your diapers!”
But did you know that even Jesus struggled with his own family? Check this out.
Jesus’ ministry is gaining momentum. He has been healing people with incurable diseases. He is giving sight to people born blind. Healing people who haven’t walked for decades. Exorcising evil spirits.
But his own brothers weren’t on board. Word had gotten out that the religious authorities didn’t approve of Jesus. And while some people talked favorably about him, others were critical. His siblings fell into the critical group.
In both John and Mark’s gospels, they tell us that not only did Jesus’ siblings not believe that he was who he said he was, but at one point they thought that Jesus was “out of his mind!” It wasn’t until after Jesus’ resurrection—when they saw their brother risen from the dead—that they believed that Jesus is the Messiah.
So, Matthew tells us:
As Jesus was speaking to the crowd, his mother and brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him. Someone told Jesus, “Your mother and your brothers are standing outside, and they want to speak to you.” (Matthew 12:46-47)
Trying to diffuse the controversy, Jesus’ family has come to collect him. They wanted Jesus to leave his ministry and just come home with them. But, being the master teacher, Jesus uses even this as a teaching opportunity.
Jesus asked, “Who is my mother? Who are my brothers?” Then he pointed to his disciples and said, “Look, these are my mother and brothers. Anyone who does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother!” (Matthew 12:47-50)
Jesus declared that his family members are those who do the will of God. These are his mother, his brothers and his sisters. Notice he doesn’t say “fathers.” That is because we have one father—that is our Heavenly Father. God Himself.
You are a child of God.
If you are a disciple of Jesus, then you are a sibling of Jesus—which makes you a child of God. This is your primary identity—and it is one that can never be taken from you. King David put it this way “Even if my father and mother abandon me, the LORD will hold me close.” (Psalm 27:10)
And this is a family that will never end.
The implications of this identity are massive. But focus on this for today: if your family misunderstands you, let it be for now. Go to your Heavenly Father and bring those needs to him. Find your affirmation in Him. Allow Him to speak into your life. Allow His word to permeate your mind and inform your spirit.
A time is coming in this world, when our family connections will end. Our loved ones will pass from this life. A time is coming when we will spend that final holiday together; when we will no longer be able to visit or call them. So with that in mind, bear with them. Learn to treasure those family members.
Family is family. Sometimes in families it takes time. And in time all will be made known.
Follow Christ, knowing he’s walked that road as well. God is doing something in and through your family. And, as far as it depends on you, make peace with these family members as well. They are truly a gift from a Heavenly Father who gives good things to his children.
Bill Herried is a pastor at CenterPoint Church in Tacoma, Washington and is married to the most extraordinary woman on the planet. Together they have 3 adult children and 4 grandchildren. He has been the lead pastor at CenterPoint Christian Fellowship in Tacoma since 2006. He has an undergraduate degree from the University of Washington in Seattle, and Master of Divinity from Corban University in Salem, Oregon—and he loves a good biryani.
Image by Hamsterfreund from Pixabay
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